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"That truth and falsehood in religion are but matter of
opinion; . . . that we are not more acceptable to God by believing this than by believing
that; that no one is answerable for his opinions; . . . that we may take up and lay down
opinions at pleasure; . . . that we may safely trust to ourselves in matters of faith, and
need no other guide - that is the principle of philosophies and heresies, which is very
weakness."
John Henry Cardinal Newman
From an essay on the Development of Christian Doctrine (VIII, 2.1), 1845
About six months ago a young married woman, the mother of four young
children, wrote to me after a visit with her parish priest. She and her husband had been
experiencing tension in their relationship around the issues of birth control and
contraception. All her friends used it and went to communion every Sunday - what should
they be doing?
The priest seemed irritated by the question and simply said,
"Birth control is okay - don’t worry about it!" She felt put off and told
the priest: "Look, I know how not to get pregnant. My husband and I were sexually
active in college. I just thought God might be asking more of us."
The question was sincere, and obviously the young couple wanted to
know how to truthfully live out their vocation of common life and love. The woman had
turned to her parish priest for spiritual insight and respectful advice about this
profound reality in this young couple’s life - the vocation of marriage. St. Paul
declares "Marriage is a great mystery." (Ephesians 5:32) Its greatness demands
we understand it and revere it as God intended.
This young mother received little pastoral care and was in effect
told to live her vocation in our secular world without the teaching of the church to guide
her. I wonder if she could have expected more? I wonder if the priest had ever read Humanae
Vitae or received solid training in a seminary explaining the rich message of this
encyclical on marriage and how it explains the clear and consistent teaching of the
church.
Today more than ever it is important for us as pastors to restate
the church’s teaching on birth control, sterilization and abortion, and at the same
time articulate the reasons behind them.
". . . the direct interruption of the generative process
already begun, and, above all, directly willed and procured abortion, even if for
therapeutic reasons, are to be absolutely excluded as licit means of regulating birth.
Equally to be excluded, as the teaching authority of the church has
frequently declared, is direct sterilization, whether perpetual or temporary, whether of
the man or of the woman. Similarly excluded is every action which, either in anticipation
of the conjugal act, or in its accomplishment, or in the development of its natural
consequences, proposes, whether as an end or as a means, to render procreation
impossible."
The kind of love we are called to live in the Christian sacrament of
marriage must imitate God’s own love for us. God’s compassion for us is
demonstrated in its ultimate fullness in the taking of human flesh by his eternal son. By
emptying himself, Christ in his eternal sovereignty took the form of a slave that we might
partake in his kingship. Still more, however, did God manifest his love for us: willingly,
Jesus Christ allowed himself to be hung upon the cross and sacrificed for his bride, the
church.
No greater act of love has time beheld - to empty one’s self of
glory for the glory of another, to sacrifice one’s own life for the eternal life of
another. Growing and journeying together in marriage can mean nothing other than being
Christ to one another, for the sake of one another’s eternal life, and never for the
sake of shallow desires seen as ends in themselves. Only when each and every expression of
conjugal love is situated within the vision of Christian vocation is the promise of
fidelity concretely lived. Only when the intimacy of husband and wife is an expression of
a unity of heart rooted in selfless and holy desire does the physical exchange between
partners reflect the outpouring of Christ’s spiritual gifts upon the church.
Since the married couple is the efficacious sign of the union of
Christ with his church, and since that latter union is the dignifying, prime exemplar of
marital love, the relationship existing between Christ and his church indicates the kind
of relationship which ought to exist between every husband and wife. "The fundamental
responsibility of a husband is to reveal to his wife God’s image and likeness within
her . . . . to listen in prayer and . . . she must do the same for him."
Imagine the blessings the young married woman might have received if
her pastor had taken the time to explain that conjugal love involves the totality of the
person and brings together in a unified expression of self every human element - the
bodily, the emotional, the affective and the spiritual. More than a unity of flesh,
conjugal love seeks a unity of mind and heart, the total and joyful oneness in body and
soul. It implies the complete gift of one’s self, the unconditional sharing of all
that one is and has.
Moreover, this mutual gift of self takes place on the spiritual
level. In fact, it is the spiritual that gives shape and meaning to the physical and
emotional union: "sexuality is raised up to God and acquires a new dimension of
eternity . . . it is not circumscribed to unlasting acts that time wipes away and wears
out, because it is elevated from the very source of love."
"By its very nature the institution of marriage and married
love is ordered to the procreation and education of the offspring and it is in them that
it finds its crowning glory." A complete and authentic love between spouses implies,
therefore, the promise of children. It is by transmitting the divine image from person to
person through procreation that couples become true ministers of life, by caring for and
educating children that they become servants of life.
One of the most valuable gifts a pastor can bring to his people is
the gift of time. How rich the dialogue could have been if the priest in dealing with this
young married woman had prayerfully reflected on Humanae Vitae, Familiaris consortio
and the New Catechism. How sad that he failed to transmit the positive values that
the church desires to share. The woman was trying to understand the good of chastity in
marriage and make the connection between contraception and the sexual acting-out of our
day. Having struggled with sexual chastity before marriage, she already knew that it was
possible to engage in sexual union apart from the obligations of marriage. Without help
from her parish priest, she now had to look for spiritual guidance elsewhere. How many
like her just give up and give in to the ways of the world?
Today more than ever the virtue of chastity is needed. Our world is
virtually enslaved with lust. It is only by mastery of self and respect for the moral
order that we can enjoy a true and healthy freedom. Sexual license and moral indifference
can never deliver it. "It becomes necessary, therefore, on the part of all, to
recover an awareness of the primacy of moral values, which are the values of the human
person as such." This, and not the choice for abortion or birth control, is the way
of responsibility and mature decision making. This, and not selfish calculation and the
violence of sin, affirms human dignity and freedom.
The church’s teachings on sexual morality, as with all her
teachings, stem from her concern and her divine mission to promote humanity’s
enduring and supernatural well-being. Her "authority" to teach comes from Jesus
Christ himself: "Whoever listens to you listens to me, and whoever rejects you
rejects me, and whoever rejects me rejects the one who sent me." (Luke 10:16) To
Peter and the apostles, Christ conferred the power to authentically interpret and preserve
throughout time all that he had taught. For the Lord could not have departed in a way
which would have resulted in the failure of his divine mission, that is, in a way which
would have left the truths of the gospel - which are necessary for salvation - in jeopardy
of being perverted or threatened by the vagary and inevitable division resulting from
differences of human opinion.
The apostles’ successors who continue Jesus’ mission
through the centuries are thus entrusted to receive and deliver the promise of the Lord to
ensure the integrity of the gospel message in an impaired human world. "All authority
in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Go therefore . . . teaching them to obey
everything that I have commanded you. And remember, I am with you always, to the end of
the age." (Matthew 28:18-20) This is why the magisterial body of the church alone is
the trustworthy guardian of the faith and moral law; and this is also why we can know with
confidence that the teaching of Humanae Vitae is a marvelous reflection of the work
of God himself.
Imagine the blessings in store for the couple who, aided by their
pastor, come to a deep respect for the sexual act within the vocation of sacramental
marriage. "I solemnly urge you; proclaim the message; be persistent whether the time
is favorable or unfavorable; convince, rebuke, and encourage, with the utmost patience and
teaching." (II Timothy 4:1-5) This is the truly loving thing to do, the gift of real
food for the spiritually hungry; for, as stated by Pope Paul VI and repeated by Pope John
Paul II, "to diminish in no way the saving teaching of Christ constitutes an eminent
form of charity for souls."
Sexual communion (without contraception) between spouses symbolizes
and deepens their commitment to each other in so far as it is the expression of their
total self-giving and their total union in body and soul. All couples have the right to
hear and to know about the fullness of beauty and life which God has for them in their
sexuality.
God created us as man and woman. He desired this distinction.
Between man and woman resides a space where infinite expansion allows for the removal of
the distance separating them. That space is the intentional realm of love. Love, the
mutual giving between two persons, is the heart of human sexuality. Thus man and woman
give themselves one to another in an immeasurable élan, which dynamism finds its most
excellent expression in procreation and constitutes the image of the New Alliance
established between God and man.
"He has made everything beautiful in its time; also he has put
eternity into man’s mind." (Ecclesiastes 3:11) We are only completed in beauty
and happiness when we embrace and experience the eternity of spiritual love which knows no
bounds, a love which is brought to perfection by the reception and pouring forth of
God’s love.
Man is a spiritual creature differentiated from every other living
creature by a transcendent capacity to know and love. In this lies our distinctive human
character, and in this we reflect the infinite operations of the Creator. We mirror God
primarily as persons, that is, insofar as we possess an intellect and will and exercise
self-mastery through choice. Our very thoughts and choices thus constitute an integral
part of being truly human They are an expression of the spiritual dimension by which each
of us is a reflection of God. But man is at once body and soul, spirit and matter united
in an intimate way. The human body is just that, human; it is a body enlivened by a
spiritual soul, while the soul is precisely the source of a bodily life. In this marvelous
mystery of human life, where the material and immaterial come together to form a single
being, the body participates by its very essence in what pertains to the soul and its
spiritual faculties.
The human body thus participates in man’s spiritual dignity and
is the visible manifestation of personal operation. It is a living and outward sign of
human interiority, and it becomes a physical image of God when we act as God himself acts.
The integral man, therefore, body and soul, is the image of the God of love. We love and
act through our bodies and in a bodily way. Any separation of bodily behavior from
man’s lofty vocation to share in divine life amounts to a disintegration of the truth
about human nature. Our bodies must be visible reflections of our souls, just as
Christ’s humanity is the visible sign of God’s love for every person. If it is a
symbol of lust, we mock the sublime mystery of the Incarnation and slight the instrument
of our salvation. If it is a symbol of selfless surrender to others, we glorify the Lord
and join in bringing creation to its heavenly repose.
Sexuality, by means of which a man and woman give themselves to one
another as an expression of total love, implies the complete gift of the human person, of
all that is interior and exterior. The totality expressed by such unification is authentic
only when a man and woman commit themselves to each other for life. If such a commitment
is not present, then the sexual act is a lie; the outward expression of the body is in
contradiction with the inner intention of the soul (reserving the possibility of
withdrawing love at a later time). The only place where the total gift of self can be
realized in its integrity is in the covenant of marriage. There spouses give themselves
wholly, holding nothing back, and become a sign of God’s faithful and limitless love
for man. What is more, while the love of the Father and Son produces the Holy Spirit, and
Christ’s love for his church specifically unfolds in the beginning of new life
through Baptism and the renewal of hearts through the gift of grace, so the love between
spouses, to be complete and unreserved, must open itself to the gift of life which is the
crowning expression of a flourishing and abounding love. The nature of conjugal love is
thus, like God’s love, total, faithful and fecund.
In his wisdom, the Creator designed human sexuality such that it
would both draw man and woman together in the joy of loving union, and also bring new life
into existence. Thus the teaching of the church affirms that sexual intercourse has two
meanings, which cannot be separated: the unitive, and the procreative. By the first, a
couple’s love is symbolized, sustained and strengthened; by the second, they stand
open to the possibility of cooperating with God in the creation of a new person. These two
essential aspects of marital intercourse cannot be separated lest the very act be deprived
of its intrinsic meaning. The procreative end of the sexual act, because it is intrinsic
to the very nature of the act, cannot be separated from the unitive without injuring
God’s design for human sexuality. For this reason, any deliberate interference in the
integrity of the sexual act which precludes the possibility of procreation is contrary to
the moral law.
Their inseparability, however, does not mean that both aspects will
necessarily be achieved in each and every conjugal act, only that neither may be
deliberately acted against. To do so would be to violate the intrinsic connection
established by God and to irreverently bring into question the divine Wisdom according to
which nature was arranged.
An internal connection exists between the love-giving and
life-giving aspects of a husband’s and wife’s interpersonal sharing. While
contraceptive practices violate it, natural means of birth regulation respect it. When
spouses make use of the God-given phases of fertility and infertility, they "act as
ministers of God’s plan, and benefit from their sexuality according to the original
dynamism of total self-giving, without manipulation or alteration."
Contraceptive practice is often justified as a means to ensure
sexual "spontaneity." But, far from adding to the sexual relationship, this
practice actually robs from it. By backing out of the Christian call to a greater gift of
self-involving sacrifice, couples evade the healthy development of their virtues necessary
for genuine love. What about courage and hope? What about self-mastery and detachment?
Rather than interfering in a manipulative manner, the true response to the legitimate
concern over child-bearing consists in regulation and cooperation. A truly developed and
fulfilling sexuality is one which knows the fruits of sexual restraint and the
person-building value of temporary abstinence. Contraception is disallowed because it is
opposed to the mature development of conjugal love; for it is contrary to its very unitive
essence and life-giving aim. In the words of Pope John Paul II, "the conjugal act,
deprived of its inner truth, because it is deprived of its procreative capacity, ceases
also to be an act of love."
This is an often over-looked point. It is not simply that we should
not separate the unitive and the procreative. We cannot separate them! Thus, when we
purposely deaden the procreative, we inadvertently deaden the unitive as well. The desire
for more sex leads to contraception which leads to less love and ironically, less sex.
In the 30th Anniversary statement on Humanae Vitae, the Holy
Father stressed that "The natural regulation of fertility can only be correctly
understood within the logic of mutual giving between the man and the woman, and
authentically lived as a qualified expression of a real and mutual communion of love and
life. It is worth emphasizing that the person can never be considered a means to reach an
end; especially, never a means for pleasure. The person is and should be solely the end of
every act."
Mature conjugal love is responsible love, and responsible love
entails respect for the biological laws determining the conjugal act as perceived by the
power of human reason. As reason is the distinctively human quality and the root of
personal dignity, every authentically human act must be governed by reason. True
parenthood thus implies correctly recognizing our duties with respect to God, nature, our
families, society and one another, according to a precise hierarchy of values which will
not allow individual free will to supersede the high requirements of the divine and
natural law.
When the divine gift of sexuality is used in a manner destructive of
its integral meaning and purpose, one contradicts the very nature of what it means to be a
man and a woman called to intimate and total unity. Married couples practicing natural
family planning methods, however, remain open to the divine gift of life and express
therefore an entirely different conception of the person and human sexuality. The church
makes no contradiction in affirming the legitimacy of natural means of regulating birth
while excluding those means directly opposed to procreation. On the one hand, couples
cooperate with the natural dispositions immanent to the generative process; on the other,
the very functions of nature are impeded. The latter is never acceptable, for "if it
is sometimes licit to tolerate a lesser evil in order to avoid a greater evil or to
promote a greater good, it is not licit, even for the gravest reasons, to do evil so that
good may follow therefrom." In virtue of the objective nature of the acts themselves,
abortion and contraception are intrinsically evil and contrary to the good of man and the
dignity of the human person. Good intentions and motives cannot make this evil into a
good.
The great deceiver speaks in our day in a variety of ways, all too
readily absorbed by the undiscerning and indifferent mentality of our time. Writings of
all sorts, frivolous television programs, vividly portrayed advertisements and motion
pictures trample on the sanctity of marriage and warp the meaning of love. Rather than
lasting human values, divorce, adultery and every sort of sexual perversion are glorified
or depicted in such a way as to make them seem unobjectionable and normal.
The negative consequences of the contraceptive mentality are
frightening: abortion, unwed pregnancy, the raising of children without a parent, the
breakdown of marriage, promiscuous activity and the basest of vices. In sum,
anti-conceptive practices are against the very good of human nature. They are opposed to
the essential dignity of man because they separate him from the natural order in which he
was constituted, of which he forms a part, and by which he is blessed according to the
divine plan. They reduce the value of his person to the purely materialistic order.
Couples who deliberately separate the unitive and procreative ends
of conjugal love share this societal irresponsibility. Once openness to life is divorced
from sexual activity, the very criterion by which we commonly judge homosexual marriages,
child pornography, masturbation and other sexually deviant forms of behavior as morally
unacceptable falls apart. Sex becomes a free-for-all; we can do whatever we want!
In the words of Mahatma Gandhi, "There is hope for a decent
life only so long as the sexual act is definitely related to the conception of precious
life. This rules out perverted sexuality and, to a lesser degree, promiscuity. Divorce of
the sexual act from its natural consequences must lead to a hideous promiscuity and to
condoning if not endorsing natural vice." Sigmund Freud affirms: "It is a
characteristic common to all the perversions that in them reproduction is put aside as an
aim. This is actually the criterion by which we judge whether a sexual activity is
perverse - if it departs from reproduction as its aim and pursues the attainment of
gratification independently." As pointed out by P. F. Lawler, neither of these
authors were inspired by specifically Christian principles, but by a simple understanding
of human nature.
"The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak." (Matthew
26:41) Out of our weakness, we sometimes fail, against the voice of conscience, to choose
what is truly good for us. Such a yielding is called sin, and amounts to a willful
disregard for the voice of God within us. The effects can be devastating. Not only does it
dull our sensitivity and weaken our discernment while harmfully transforming the
tendencies of our individual natures, but the guilt which follows from it, if neither
acknowledged nor expiated, can sink deep into the core of our being to the destruction of
our inner peace and tranquillity. Real guilt (not to be confused with the psychological
fact of shame) is identified by some modern analysts as the central feature in personality
disorder. Fortunately, for the Christian, the call to perfection is graciously coupled
with the assurance of compassion. The church who never ceases to proclaim the mercy of God
and the forgiveness of sins in Christ Jesus, gently encourages every sinner to confidently
approach the Lord in the sacrament of penance, that he may be lifted up and renewed in his
struggle on the pilgrimage to happiness. "If we say that we have no sin, we deceive
ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he who is faithful and just
will forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness." (I John 1:8-9)
The parish priest who takes time to work with discerning couples
should help them see that by cooperating with the free gift of grace, they enter into a
deeper participation in the divine life, are raised above their very nature, are offered
the joys and marvels of divine love and understanding, and contribute to God’s plan
for the restoration of the world. We become true collaborators with God the Creator only
when respecting the conditions of our created nature.
By practicing natural methods of family regulation, couples
experience the freedom and uplifting vigor of cooperating with the will of God. Besides
the advantages of being healthier than artificial means of birth control, natural family
planning entails a holistic approach to sexuality and fosters a greater awareness of each
other’s bodies, the development of intimate communication, the amplification of ways
of expressing affection, and growth in virtue. As the two draw closer in mutual
understanding and cultivate that discipline necessary for true freedom, they learn to
better cope with the challenges of life and more deeply enjoy an authentic love. Conjugal
love is not hindered, but elevated; enriched with spiritual values, couples and their
families discover the gift of true peace and happiness. "How can I ever express the
happiness of the marriage that is joined together by the church, announced by angels and
ratified by the Father? . . . How wonderful the bond between two believers, with a single
hope and a single desire . . . where there is no separation between them in spirit or
flesh."
CONCLUSION
After 30 years, the church continues to proclaim the truth of Humanae
Vitae to all Christians to help them responsibly fulfill their call to holiness in
Christ Jesus. When evaluating the moral dimensions of human sexuality, the church does not
lose sight of the vast complexity of its stages of development - psychological, physical,
social and cultural. Therefore, dedicated pastors must help the faithful understand that
one of the great contemporary moral difficulties of the day is our all-too-pervasive
contraceptive mentality. The priest must help couples recognize and find their way through
it. The teachings of the Catholic Church clarify the naturally established structure of
sexual activities and shed light on the fact that the marital act possesses a dual
integrity: openness to life and loving union. Since both of these aspects are essential to
each conjugal act, if there is a serious reason to forego procreation for a time, then the
couple must make recourse to the natural periods of infertility.
In paragraphs 28 and 29 of Humanae Vitae, each of us as
priests is challenged to be a spiritual guide for the people of our day. First, we are to
give "the example of loyal internal and external obedience to the teaching authority
of the church." This is a call for faithfulness to the magisterium of the church and
a living out of the words of the Apostle Paul: "I appeal to you, brethren, by the
name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you agree and that there be no dissensions
among you, but that you be united in the same mind and the same judgment." (I
Corinthians 1:10)
This fidelity to the saving teaching of Christ is seen as a form of
charity for souls and something which must be accompanied by patience and goodness. The
challenge here is to spend time with married couples as they search for ways to grow in
holiness.
At the same time, the parish priest must reach out to those who
continue to live a contraceptive way of life and patiently draw them closer to Christ.
"Teach married couples the indispensable way of prayer; prepare them to have recourse
often and with faith to the Sacraments of the Eucharist and of penance, without ever
allowing themselves to be discouraged by their own weakness."
It is a challenge to help married couples develop their conscience
through clear and patient preaching, through thoughtful response to questions, and prayer
for the married couples we serve, but it is a challenge we must accept.
The priest has a unique opportunity in his catechesis and
preparation of couples for marriage to share the message of Humanae Vitae. These
couples he serves are called to strive for the holiness of marriage so challenging in our
contraceptive culture.
It is important to present our Catholic faith from a positive point
of view. Only in the larger vision of Christian vocation can limitations to sexual
pleasure and expression assume their true meaning. Christian marriage is a divine
institution, and conjugal love is at once personal, fully human (both bodily and
spiritual), total (entailing a friendship of selfless giving), faithful and exclusive unto
death, fruitful (mutually edifying through personal communion and parenting), social, and
divine (finding in God both its source and final goal). The loving will of God, expressed
in the teachings of the Catholic Church, does not exclude sexual pleasure, but
contextualizes and relativizes it, ultimately raising the appreciation of human sexuality
to greater and more sacred heights. Married Christian chastity does not obstruct human
freedom, but rather places sexual pleasure and passion in the fuller, more dignified
context of a complete married love. It brings not less freedom to married couples, but
more of it: If you live according to my teaching, you are truly my disciples; then you
will know the truth, and the truth will set you free." (John 8:31,32)
May, 1998 |
