BLUEPRINT
FOR AN NFP-FOCUSED PARISH Part 2 of 2
Fr. Matthew Habiger OSB and Fr. Dan McCaffrey
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This
is why every parish, or cluster of small parishes, needs a
set of NFP teachers. If we are to begin to cut into the 50%
divorce rate among our people, then we must address the 85%
contraceptive rate, and now 40% sterilization rate, among
Catholic couples of childbearing age. This will be a
massive effort, and will require the cooperation of many
parties. Fortunately, this is a team effort, and there are
many players available.
Pastors will
have to take the initiative here. The life of Faith is
lived and promoted primarily at the parish level. Either
the Faith is fostered at the parish level, or it simply does
not happen. Thus pastors cannot push off these
responsibilities to the chancery. The chancery exists to
serve the needs of the parish. It cannot replace the
pastor.
The retrieval
of a pro-marriage, pro-spousal love and pro-family culture
in a parish begins with the efforts of the priests. Pastors
have a vital, role to play. They were ordained to proclaim
God’s plan for marriage, spousal love and family to their
people, and to provide the Sacraments. The people must hear
God’s remarkable plan from the pulpit, where everyone hears
the same message. Preaching God’s plan with conviction is a
pastor’s first responsibility in promoting strong
marriages. There is a wealth of material available for this
pulpit work.
We priests
need to recall Pope Paul VI’s reassuring challenge to us in
Humanae Vitae #29: “So beloved Sons, preach with full
confidence and be certain that the Holy Spirit of God, who
guides the Magisterium in its teaching, will illuminate the
hearts of the faithful and invite them to give their
assent.” This means that God is the primary power at work
in all faithful preaching, and that we can be assured He
will not disappoint us if we are his faithful laborers.
This is the
Year of the Priest, and St. Jean Vianney is held up as our
model. We recall that the Cure d’Ars did not wait for
signals from his chancery office to begin his focused
preaching and sacramental ministry. Nor did he depend upon
the approval of surrounding parishes to sustain him in his
God-given vocation. The Spirit of Jesus guided him and
sustained him throughout all his heroic efforts. Pope Paul
VI reminds us: “Refusal to compromise anything concerning
the saving doctrine of Christ is an outstanding act of
charity to souls; yet at the same time it is necessary
always to combine this with patience and goodness” (HV
29).
If the pastor
is not with the program, then there is no program. Without
his initiative, and his sustained encouragement, nothing
will happen and the status quo continues. The pastor must
see the clear connection between contraception and divorce,
between contraception and the breakdown of marriage. That
should motivate him to seek ways to address the root of the
problem.
A pastor has
great resources at his disposal in the parish. There are
many gifted and faith-filled couples who will respond to the
need, once they are convinced that the parish is making a
serious effort to build up strong marriages and happy
families. A pastor has only to reach out to these couples
and invite them to become NFP teachers. A typical parish
needs several NFP teaching couples, as we shall explain
shortly. These couples should have a strong marriage, be
relatively young, living their faith, and be willing to
witness to this.
NFP teaching
couples need to be thoroughly trained in the art of NFP.
They can seek their formation from any of the major
providers of NFP in this county. (See our website for
contact information:
www.nfpoutreach.org.) The parish should cover all
their expenses incurred while becoming certified teachers.
This will become their apostolate. The very least the
parish can do is to cover their expenses for becoming
certified instructors. They become excellent assets to the
parish program in a vital area.
One NFP
teaching couple cannot possibly do all the work that is
needed in a parish. There is more to be done than working
with the young couples in the marriage prep program. Here
is what is involved in a contemporary viable parish:
The
marriage preparation program needs the full program of
NFP. It is not enough to simply provide an introductory
session on NFP during the marriage prep program. The pastor
should explain to young couples, “If you are contracepting,
I’m not going to marry you in the Church. A contracepting
arrangement is not a consummated marriage. I don’t want to
enable you to sin. If you don’t believe in this, then you
are not a Catholic.”
This means
that any couple preparing for marriage must be prepared to
use a morally good means of spacing pregnancies, when there
are justifying reasons for doing this. If they do not
understand NFP, then they will immediately resort to using
the Pill. This leads right into the contraceptive culture,
which, in turn, leads to a 50% divorce rate.
RCIA
people need to hear about the remedy for contraception.
RCIA candidates should affirm the Church’s teaching on
contraception, or not be brought into the Church. This
issue must be clarified. Nationwide, there is a 60% dropout
rate among RCIA people received into the Church. What is
the advantage of providing an incomplete RCIA program, with
such a dropout rate? This issue needs to be clearly
addressed. This means that RCIA couples of childbearing age
must also learn NFP by taking the prescribed 4-5 classes.
Juniors
and seniors in the parish religious education program
should know the basics about NFP and chastity. Fertility
awareness and appreciation is very important especially for
this age group. This means more work for the parish NFP
teachers. Contraception reaches into our high schools and
middle schools. If our teenagers do not appreciate God’s
plan for sex and marriage, and why sex is to be saved for
marriage, then they become easy victims of the dominant
culture.
Less than
5% of Catholic couples practice NFP. This means that
the vast majority of Catholic couples knows almost nothing
about NFP, and will need to find instruction when they
realize that contraception is seriously sinful and must be
repented of. That means more work for the parish NFP
teaching couples, and for the priests who must evangelize
them.
It should be
obvious that one NFP teaching couple cannot do all the work
for the parish. Building strong marriages and healthy,
happy families is a herculean task. There are many people
in the parish who can help with the task. They need to be
recruited and encouraged. Retrieving and restoring God’s
plan for marriage and spousal love is largely the work of
the laity, but then the laity is 99.9% of the Church. There
are plenty of workers for the vineyard. This is heavily the
work of the lay apostolate. Many parishioners will be
involved with marriage prep programs, RCIA, religious
education, and marriage enrichment programs.
This is a
joint effort. The laity can’t do the priest’s work, nor can
the priest do the laity’s work. The pastor must proclaim
God’s plan for marriage and spousal love. The people must
see that their pastor passionately believes in this. In his
preaching the pastor must explain the rationale of NFP, the
beauty of God’s plan for human love and sexuality as
provided in Humanae Vitae and Familiaris Consortio,
and draw upon some of the helpful insights in the Theology
of the Body. Then the people will become more open to God’s
plan. Only then can the NFP teachers teach the methodology
of NFP to a receptive audience. To bring about the obedience
of Faith, both aspects, the theological and the methodology,
must be applied. One cannot function without the other.
It is our
experience that couples who practice NFP are very generous
people. They demonstrate generosity in their marriage and
their families. They become the parish’s best and most
sustained volunteers. They are generous contributors to the
collections. Most vocations to religious life and the
priesthood come from these families. It is all to a
pastor’s advantage to encourage his people to abide by God’s
plan for spousal love. It will revolutionize the parish.
We priests,
and now Deacon Rick and Jenny Condon, at NFP Outreach are
available to help you get these programs started. You can
reach us at our website (www.nfpoutreach.org),
by phone: 405 942 4084, or by email:
nfpoutreach@att.net.
Let the healing of our marriages and the strengthening of
family life begin!
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